As I had mentioned in my earlier post, that I would share my own involvements with such kindaa phony individuals, So here I’m back with an Insight:
First of all – It is good to remember that back-biters are everywhere.
Even we do that to others but don’t realize it, as we are not at the receiving end.Those who bitch to you about others, will bitch about you to others. We can never choose what people will like to do, but can be wise to make friends with people who choose to do right things. It is foolish to be naïve enough to readily trust people. Secrets, especially, are tough to be kept under cover, even by the most matured people.
Controlling and deciding what others do or say is pointless. To avoid your feet from getting burnt, it is better to wear slippers than to spread carpet wherever you go ?
Words can wound terribly – Be less sensitive to others’ thoughtless words.
Share your secrets with your diary and keep it safe! Tried and Tested..
While interacting with people,speak only what is necessary, what is good and what is true.Sometimes, people trouble us only to satisfy their devilish instincts. In that case, although it is easier said than done, simply ignore them.
People who torment others are suddenly clueless if the sufferer remains calm and unruffled.I have seen that, they soon loose their sting.
They only remember you and call, when they want something.
All friendships need to be treated equally – which means that you should receive as much as you put in, it’s all grounded on reciprocation and affinity, I stalwartly believe.
If you’re putting in more than you’re getting out, you should think twice about what they are asking from you.
You have to think twice of what you speak and how you speak.
Do you find yourself in the position that you are constantly justifying (Trust me, I personally went through this ordeal) just spend your whole time focused on them when you’re hanging out?
Yeah that’s not cool – We all have problems and things we’d like to talk to somebody about, but all such kindaa people want is that you dance to their tune.
They put you down or make fun of you in front of others
A positive no-no. Usually, people do this because they feel bad about themselves and want to use somebody else as a distraction.
Draw a line over any friendships like this immediately, I did that and trust me have never been at peace like the way I am now.
You feel bad about yourself when you’ve spent time with them
Sometimes it’s difficult to analyse behavior, but your emotions never lie. Friends should make you feel good, empowered and uplifted. If they leave you feeling like crap then you should probably re-evaluate the benefit you’re getting from the friendship.
Some people, unfortunately, just like to bring others down they suffer from this disease. Get well soon buddy ?
They are aggressively competitive
It’s good to be a little competitive now and again, but like most things – you can have too much of a good thing.
A friendship based on competitive behavior is NEVER healthy or a true friendship. Some people just like to show off their materialistic things and they feel the same for others as well, I have witnessed this
Mental disorder in a person, trust me this thinking has no cure..
They bring drama into your life
It’s usually the people who spend their time nitpicking about drama are the ones causing it, took me some time to deal with this but the moment I decided to pinch such people out of my life they decided to spread negativity around me ?
They bitch about you behind your back
An absolute no-no. Friendships need to be based on mutual respect and trust. Don’t put up with that crap.
Took me some time to realize, that the person I thought was a friend was the one tattle talking and twisting things from here to there.
They use your secrets against you and share them
This is malicious and absolutely nothing a true friend would ever do. Seriously they lend a listening ear first and spill it out of their mouth all twisted. (Snake in the Grass)
They talk about their other friends behind their back
If they do this, the chances are, they do it to you too. I didn’t realize this before people kept telling me but I couldn’t see the reality behind the mask worn.
It’s fine to have a moan occasionally, but anything malicious would probably indicate that they aren’t as genuine as they’d like you to believe.
Such people are just a massive douche-bag lol, What sucks is that, they sound like they talk about other people because they themselves are insecure and all of her other friends act like her because they are afraid to be the victims of her toxicity ?.
True friendship doesn’t run on fear, Trust me. I’ve recently lost someone that I considered one of my friends. We had been friends for about 4 years and our friendship gradually moved from being a casual one to being super close friends.
I thought our friendship was rock solid. We did hang out all the time. Drank till the wee hours of the morning. Even found new hobbies together. The person I could tell anything to. The person I called when things were going bad in my life, my job, and anything that life threw my way.
It was the same with her, calling and texting all the time about shit going on in her life, we had a sizable group of mutual friends as well. But every time we went out we ended up chatting for hours after everyone had gone home.
We both had our own friends and did our own things and the friendship never had that clingy feel that some often do. We did have obstacles to our friendship though. One that eventually led to its demise.
Our friendship was constantly questioned and talked about as if we were a couple and everyone disproved. Neither of us had any romantic feelings for the other ?. But in the end, she didn’t have the ability to withstand the constant barrage of some people telling her crap things.
The way our friendship ended was uncivilized as I discovered something pathetic. I know for a fact that my closest friends that I’ve known my entire life discuss, what they perceive to be my flaws when I’m not around.
This all came to light gradually, I was so stunned by this that I initially had absolutely no idea how to respond. I could sense that they’d become all tense and wound up, and it felt like they didn’t want to have a discussion about it, but just to attack or humiliate.
Let the Friendship naturally Fade Out..
Such people are outright Bitchy and Indicative of some messed up Psychology, so leave them alone….