“Always go with the choice that scares you the most, because that’s the one that is going to help you grow.” — Caroline Myss
Well, recalling my journey with my husband
– We thought that, we had this whole marriage thing figured out, After all we are a modern couple.
An egalitarian partnership (Just the way I like to term it).
Primarily we had to figure some things out, but overall:
Bingo!! No Problem…
It’s impossible to label, just how much of workload surges when kids come along. Though, one of the utmost tough part about parenting is that so much of it is imperceptible and is overlooked.
Being a mom does have enough of a toll on our bodies and hormones, let alone our lifestyle too, because over a period of nine months you come to take care of a life besides yours. Suddenly you have this little baby dependent on you for everything and in some eccentric way as it becomes our sole aim in life to protect this prized pint of joys for life.
Frequently, the mom is the one who clutches onto all of “behind-the-scenes” knowledge about various things involved in raising a kid. She’s the one who strategies, who notices, who anticipates, who explores, who fears. Let’s be frank, usually the dads think that they are doing the same sum of work as the other. But sometimes they can just be entirely oblivious of the countless things that is taken care of by the mother “Singly”.
When I gave birth to my first kid, I desired to become a responsible adult and it is my duty to take care of the whole house like how we saw our parents doing it. And laterally, I projected the same amount of maturity from my husband too and that was the very first and unsolicited transformation I thought of. Bizarre isn’t it, no one told me I had to do it, but I just presumed it and wanted to implement that way of living instantaneously.
That’s where the alterations amongst us as a couple commenced. When you not only want to modify every aspect of your life, but also people around you and that is what we do wrong. Change can be good and bad, fast and slow, instant and still managing, it is upon us what change we take on and whether we can keep up with the choice we make.
“WHY” that’s the question I never thought of asking myself, why did I have to become this matured responsible and sole caretaker of everything. Why was it that, becoming a mom had to change who I was as an individual? No, I didn’t do that I just changed and as I said we have to live up to the consequences of the choice we make and so did I, all I found was a dull part of me living a routine and that I wasn’t content at all.
The smart-ass decision I had made of becoming this responsible, mature sole caretaker of the house, turned out to be not so smart after all since I was not happy the aura around my house was not that of a happy one either. And all this led to me closing in a shell and creating walls around me and my son. However, I still hadn’t asked myself “WHY”.
Well, I subsisted and along came my second. This time, it took me three months of sickness when I had literary nothing to do but spew, snooze and then again retch.
But nevertheless, scuffling through my difficult time of pregnancy I delivered a gorgeous daughter who got back my old self of being what I used to be before marriage.Swiftly, I felt the transformation and I decided to clean up my own act and get hold of myself, become the crazy person that I was.
Not only that, but I did learn an enormously valuable lesson that there are few changes that have to be done the right away and some changes that need to be done over a period of time and it’s completely up to us to differentiate between them and take on how much we can, surplus of anything is injurious to our health .